Cache directory "/home7/mammalov/public_html/wp-content/plugins/ttftitles/cache" is not writable.An Old Community is New

I joined Twitter in 2007, but fell in love with it in 2008.  The love affair continued in 2009, but waned in 2010 as what I have since discovered my thyroid decided to give up the ghost.

Coincidentally, Twitter became crowded.  I didn’t find the information I used to when I went to Twitter with a question.  Everyone was pimping something and the conversations that seemed to happen without hierarchy appeared to be lost to me.

I’m back on Twitter and trying to sort through the noise, but it isn’t as cute as I remembered sorta like that boy you had a crush on in high school–the one you imagined aged into a George Clooney only to find at the 25th reunion he went more in the direction of George Costanza.

Still lovable, but not one you want to rip your clothes off.

Oddly, the online community where I have found more conversation this year is Facebook.

You know what…

I started writing this in my head earlier today and now that I put it on “paper” I’m calling bullshit on myself.

I’m responding to a writing prompt that I received through social media, but that doesn’t mean I need to think about a social media community.

And as much as I do believe in online communities and the amazing connections that can bloom from them, I still need for a community to become personal and occasionally exist in my real life for it to have meaning for me.

So where did I discover community this year?  I’m not sure I found any new ones.

I’ve always been someone who liked to be part of a community–someone who almost needed a community to feel valuable.  This year I think I’ve discovered (and I’m not entirely sold on this thought but I still have three more weeks to solidify it) the community in me.  Dare I say I am finding more confidence in myself without a community to reinforce my worth (or make me feel even worse about myself).  This is still a new concept for me, so don’t rush me into buying it completely.

Is this new discovery a factor of turning 40?  Not sure.  I’ve always assumed everyone else was completely well-adjusted and supremely self-confident by the age of 18.  Like I said yesterday, I think I’m a late bloomer.

This is a completely rambling and nonsensical post that probably should have been saved for a private journal, but I won’t because I have nervously admitted to the world that I might actually care more about what I think about myself than what others think.

And if you were my therapist from my 20’s, you’d be blown away.

Today’s post is inspired by #reverb10 and the following prompt.

Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?

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3 Responses to “An Old Community is New”

  1. Christie

    I love posts like this one that sort themselves out as they go. This comment will probably proceed in a similar fashion. :)

    I feel the same way about Twitter, “trying to sort through the noise” and for me, not entirely sure which conversation to join. It’s a little like walking up to strangers at a sales conference and trying to find a way into the discussion. I’ll be 40 next year and I’m still working on the whole well-adjusted, supremely self-confident thing, but perhaps finding the community in you might be the best way to find your community out there.

  2. Just Margaret

    You know–I think it may in fact be the 40 thing. I hit 40 myself this year, and am finding that I yearn less for the external community. At the risk of sounding cynical, people can be really annoying. I know I haven’t found any new community myself this year. I did jump into twitter in 2010, but still, almost 1000 tweets in, I feel…ignorant, like I still don’t “get it”.

    As for future community–I’m hoping to get more traction in my attempt to create, even loosely, a community of parents in my school district who want to support the G&T program. Either that, or I’m ready to bail altogether on this community and move to an entirely new one (and back to civilization) where they have better public schools.

  3. Loralee

    I seriously think it’s the late 30’s thing. I am caring less and less what the freak others think of me. (And I LOVED the ’18 and confident thing” I truly thought EVERYONE FIGURED IT OUT BUT ME!)

    Muwah gorgeous! xo

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